Ned England Begins Fall Lamppost Count Series; Summer Data 'Inconclusive Due To Humidity'

WAUKESHA — Ned England has returned to his lawn chair at the Frame Park pedestrian bridge to kick off the fall session of what he calls his air-quality observation protocol, a method that consists of sitting still and counting how many of the visible streetlights along the bike path he can make out from his seat.

England, 70, of Backslide Way, documents the effort for Nedsmokedout, his second YouTube channel, which has grown to four subscribers this month, up from three over the summer. His baseline figure on a clear day is nine lampposts. Anything less, he says, indicates reduced atmospheric visibility.

A rough start to the season

His first October reading, taken Tuesday at 4:15 p.m., came in at 7.5 lampposts, a number England arrived at after the ninth post was "half-obscured by what I believe was a departing goose." He has entered it into his tracking spreadsheet with an asterisk.

"October's baseline shows approximately 15% hazier atmospheric visibility than September, likely due to leaf cover and humidity transition," England said, reading from a laminated index card he brings to each session. "I want to be clear this is preliminary. I am not drawing conclusions yet. I am a man with a lawn chair and a hypothesis."

The summer data problem

England has formally declared his 2025 summer lamppost readings inconclusive, citing what he described as inconsistent humidity between sessions. A string of readings taken in July, when he logged as few as five visible lampposts on back-to-back Tuesdays, has been flagged in his notes with the phrase "discard pending review," which he has written in red pen on three separate pages.

"I had some beautiful numbers in June. Then July happened and I don't trust any of it anymore."

— Ned England, Backslide Way resident

He said he considered re-running the summer season entirely but decided against it, citing both the time commitment and his son Trevor's gentle suggestion that "maybe not every season needs its own dataset."

A winter protocol in development

Looking ahead, England is drafting what he calls a winter protocol, which would substitute lamppost halos for lamppost counts once shorter days make a straight count less reliable after 5 p.m. He has not finalized how a halo is measured, though he has ruled out using his phone's camera flash, calling an early test "not scientifically rigorous and also startling to a passing jogger."

Trevor England, who lives with his father on Backslide Way, said he mostly hears about the project at dinner. "He'll just say a number," Trevor said. "Like, 'eight tonight.' And I say okay, Dad, eight."

England plans to take readings twice weekly through November, weather and goose activity permitting. He said he's open to a city employee eventually corroborating his findings, though he acknowledged nobody from the city has been informed the study exists.

"I'm not asking anyone to believe me yet," England said. "I'm asking them to wait for the data. Although also, separately, if the Parks Department replaced bulb number six, my numbers would probably look a lot better."